Friday, June 5, 2020

On Divorce


Divorce was never something forbidden in the ancient church but it is not to be taken lightly.  With marriage comes a commitment to a spouse, and when children are born or adopted, this commitment extends to the children.  These commitments also extend to our parents and siblings.  We are bound together in one huge covenant relationship.

My parents were married for nearly 50 years.  My mother passed away about 7 years ago and my father still feels a deep loss at her death.  I have often wondered how they sustained this relationship.  My father is rather emotionally immature and he has a limited education.  Early in their marriage, when I was still in high school, my father had affairs with 3 ladies at work.  My mother never spoke of these to me, I sensed a wave of deep anger in her but I never understood the source of this anger.  I do not know why my mother stayed but I do know that they worked on their marriage and improved their relationship.

Maybe part of the answer to the question is the castle, sitting on a hill overlooking our mountain valley.  Some call it the Logan Temple but I always saw it as a castle that protected our town.  I and my brother were sealed to my parents in this castle when I was a month old.  I had just undergone emergency surgery that preserved my life.

My parents never attended church, but whenever I passed this castle my mom reminded me that we were a forever family because of the promises she made there to me, my siblings, and my father.

Again, I do not say that divorce is never necessary, I have had at least one grandmother who found divorce was needed, due to spousal abuse.  What I say is if a way can be found to preserve the marriage it can benefit the wider family relationship.

I have found, with experience, and time, that my parents, siblings, wife, and children have been blessed by mom’s choice to stay with my father and to honor her temple covenants.

A portion of a paper I wrote for a BYU-I class on The Articles of Father
This week we were studying Article 6. 

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