Saturday, May 1, 2021

On the discovery of the Siblings

It started as a late-night text from someone who was little more than an acquaintance and little less than a friend.  It would lead to this one becoming family.

Kelley had been preparing his yearly tax reports for the better part of a decade. Once a year, he would gather his information and schedule an appointment. Kelley would then prepare the tax returns, one for Idaho, one for Utah, and one for the Federal Government. 

He met Kelley when he needed help with tax preparation. Kelly was a friend of his sister.

The text said, "I think my niece is your son's sister." 

His only response was, "How did her father die." 

It is essential to understand his two children were adopted. Their Birth Mother was his wife's sister, and both children came from separate Birth Fathers. 

When he awoke the following day, a simple reply, Alan killed himself. Kelley then became his family, and he learned of the sister.

Before this day, the thought had never occurred to him that Alan may have an ex-wife and children.  He pleaded with Kelley to speak with his niece and ask her not to contact Nicholas until he could inform his son of this new information. 

He was able to visit his son the next day and inform him that he had two sisters and a brother from Alan and Vicki. 

He spoke to Vicki about Nicholas's birth and Alan's death. He wondered how Alan felt about the adoption and was it a contributing factor in Alan's death. 

She assured him that Alan was happy to see Nicholas placed in a good home. The adoption had not been a contributing factor in Alan's Death. Alan was bipolar and an alcoholic and knew he would not be able to raise Nicholas with Nancy. 

In the coming days, he and his wife met with Nicholas's sister in a restaurant, and they then became family.

They have since discovered that Nicholas is bipolar, and his sister has been a big help in adjusting him to his new diagnosis. 

God makes a family in many mysterious ways.  Open your heart and mind, and he will help extend your family too. 


Sunday, April 25, 2021

On life with Momma and Nance

I have come to recognize, and now to love, that I am my Momma’s child. I have rebelled for years against the idea that we share the same personality.
Life with Momma was a dance. I reached out, she pushed away. She reached out I pushed away. In the end, we came together, and beautiful was the dance.
Momma had a younger sister named Nancy but called her Nance. Accepting that Momma and I share a personality is to accept that I share one with Nance. They were twin sisters born 18 months apart. Momma and Nance shared a room until Momma married, then they shared a family. Momma could have babies, and Nance knew how to raise them. Even on family Vacations, they shared a bed, Momma sleeping between Daddy and Nance.
Nance was my nanny until the age of three when she moved to Bountiful to start her own life. Most of my memories of these early years are shadows. We spent so much time together, people accused her of having a child out of wedlock. Nance taught me how to love and that people could be trusted to fill my needs.
After Nance was married and she and Jack had no babies, Momma would send a child each summer to spend a few weeks with Nance. Nance then began a childcare center in her home. One brother and sister, she raised for years.
Loving Momma was like loving a cactus in a coffee can.
"Two weeks to say hello and goodbye
She gave me this cactus, said 'It's kinda like me
It'll hurt you to hold it, but it blooms every spring." 
Life with Daddy was not easy, but she loved him so. Momma’s drug of choice was Television. She watched Television like a drunk consumes cheap whiskey.

I learned in my twenties; Momma kept a pack of cigarettes in her car. She used to consume those on drives when she was learning to love Daddy once more.
To accept that I am Momma’s child is to rejoice that I am Nance’s child too. I can have the best of two women and their world. To accept and celebrate the legacy left by two beautiful women who shared a family together.





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