glorias touch ver 2.0

When I was fourteen years old,  I was ask by a man I respected to commit to serving a mission.  I accepted this challenge and used the next 5 years to prepare to serve a mission.

My Mom and I entered in a covenant.  When I prepared, myself, to serve a mission she would support me.   This was a big commitment on her part.  We where not a wealthy family.  Though,  my Mom, had not attended services in at least 10 years, she practiced the Gospel of Forgiveness

Priesthood is the power to act in the name of god.   This authority was given to Joseph Smith by John the Baptist, the same person that baptized Jesus Christ.

This same authority has been passed down from man to man by the laying on of hands.  I was ordained by my Bishop, Glen Owen Waite when I turned 16 years old. 

The church has a lay Priesthood and all worthy men in our church receive this authority.  I was ordained, a priest, by my bishop because my Father had stopped attending church.  My Father had ordained me a Deacon and Teacher.  I was ordained an Elder, by my beloved uncle, Deloye Grant Herzog, when I turned 18.

 The life and Death of Gloria

To start an exploration.

I met Gloria Hearn in a Hospital.  She was receiving treatment for brain cancer.  This cancer would end Gloria's life.   Gloria told me, the person who lead her to the L.D.S. Church, was was a chain smoking non active member of the church.

To heal in faith

We have a Priesthood Ordinance.  It is a blessing with Olive Oil and sealing with the Priesthood.  I offered this ordinance to Gloria.  I did not to want appear as a faith healer.

• I wanted to see Gloria enter the covenant of Baptism
• I wanted, to see,  her conversion, or turning back to God.
• I did not want to see a woman, who was dying, not one  grasping for life.

She was Baptized after I transferred to my next area.
 When I  called to check on her, after I was home, I learned she had died.

• Gloria helped me to understand that God works in many wonderful ways.  He uses his children to bless one another other.  We are his hands on Earth. 

• God used my parents, who did not attend church services, to support my mission

• God used a member who did attend services to help Gloria gain a testimony of the gospel of Christ.

We may not see the many hidden hands and ways God uses to bless his children.

"... it is quite possible that God’s purpose is something different from the purpose of either party; and yet the human instrumentalities, working just as they do, are of the best adaptation to effect his purpose."

 (Collected Works of Abraham Lincoln, edited by Roy P. Basler.)

Not of my accord

If I were lead to hell,
Not of my accord,
Would you be with me?

Would you hold my hand,
And sing sweet lullaby's,
Of comfort to me.

Though knowest the end,
And the beginning.

What must I learn,
Being driven to Hell,
Like Job, or Virgil.

Though standest by me,
As a true friend.

Of free will then comes the choice,
But not the consequences.

Never alone, am I,
Or far from thee,
And thy thoughts.

(Inspired from reading of "The Sparrow", Maria Doria Russell,1996)

Luv you still

If you knew,
I was a sinner,
Would you luv,
me, still?

Still, I am,
A sinner, still.

Never moving,
Never growing.

Dammed, I am,
By choice,
My own.

To grow, I must,
Be dammed, no more.

Yet I luv,
You, still.

On television, and cheap whiskey

She consumed television,

like a drunk consumed,

cheap whiskey.

To mask this pain,

We now, both share

The pack of cigarettes,
she kept, waiting in the car.

It calmed her nerves
To Drag the car,
and the cigarette.

She knelt at an alter,
the altar to her God.

To make this covenant,
with her God,

that she would carry my father's burden,
Like a thorn in her flesh.

Like her God carried her,
so long ago,
like a crown made of thorns

This was their covenant marriage.

Helpmeets they were,
they completed each other.

Mom died a few years ago
in helping my, Father

I carry her burden.
I live in her world.

In understanding my father,
I  understand myself.
I recognize the source of her pain.

She deeply loved my father,
and never wanted the world to see,
the man she knew and loved.

My wife and I knelt at an alter
with our children too.

We made a covenant,
that comes with a crown of thorns.

Someday, when our children,
have children.

I hope they learn to live,
and luv our world too.

To sin, the choice.

To sin the choice,
This I have made.

Sin is a choice
And to this I do.

Of ignorance comes,
the transgression.

But this sin,
I must choose.

Of foreknowledge,
And desire.

I have chosen this,
Sin for so long.

A pattern it is,
And I know no other.

Other sinners,
Must I seek.

Like two drunks,
In an A.A. meeting.

Will Bill and Bob,
Help me to change.

To sin no more,
A day at a time.

Then  is this
The church real,

The Body of Christ.

Sinners in a great AA meeting.

This, then still

There he lies.

The stench of death,
It lingers by ...

It is the death,
The one, he,
has longed for.

Now, I will rob him.
Of the death.
The  good death.

Soon will come the EMT,
The ambulance too.

The stench of death,
Tobe removed,
from his room.

As will he.

Doctors, their will be
And hospitals, too

Soon,
To be replaced,

By another, Room
In another, Place.

A living death,
With no stench,

Just desire,  unfulfilled

The good death,
I robbed him of,

The mystery of the poetry

From whence does it come.
Milton speaks from the past,
As does More and Tyndale
Still what of Chesterton and Feynman.

These are the voices of long since past.

Ruth Mcqueen spoke with her poetry,
And painting,
Water colors at first and then the oils.

The poems seam to come
With the anger.

Forgotten and shattered dreams.
Miraculous preservation from the accident.

To know what it feels like,
A mac truck to be over run by.

The cancer long since hidden,
No longer to hide.

A daughter angry at her father,
As he was angry with his mother.

Still their is the new song.
So grateful to have.

So from whence does it come,
I know not now.

But grateful I am,
And rejoice their in.

Luke's sabor, and the choice

lukes saber, and the choice.

still it calls to me

like a saber 

long left in a chamber.

to be preserved,

or neglected.

once it was a choice,

or leap of faith.

he took it from me

like my childhood

and my mom.

he saught to preserve

but only destroyed.

now to me it seeks,

the choice,

to return ,

or destroy.

can we be redeemed

the saber 

my father 

and me.

*the saber that preserved our lives in the clone wars, took the lives of the young ones at at the jedi temple.  Tools do not destroy men choose to destroy.

(714) 733-9969

I lost it today,

my religion.

Left long neglected,

so long ago.

like a sign,

on a road,

to nowhere.

like a phone booth, 

in the desert.

Do I call it, 

or does it call me.

and when i call

does it hear me?

ring

and ring
and ring.

still i ask,
Is it the service,

or is it me.

Note "losing my religion" is a reference to the R.E.M song. It refers to losing ones temper.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mojave_phone_booth

This the phone number for a pay phone that once stood, in the crossroads, in the middle of the Mojave Desert.

-- 

Steven Bassett

Uncle Eddie's jewerly box

There it sits.

Its owner long past gone.

What does a man do
With a jewerly box.

To him, was a thing a man desired,

like football, and crochet.

He was like his fruitcakes, many people thought.

But I learned different.

The ladies at the nursing home, loved him.

So strong, and gentle, and kind.

Then she came, admired him long,  she had, from a far.

Brought together then, by the ladies.

Now they are one, together and apart.

She will now, join him, never to depart.

And we will have the memories,

and the jewerly box.

Waiting on Momma

Went to visit momma today

She wasn't their,
Like so many times,
Long ago.

I had left

When she came,

So long ago .

Then she waited,
And waited
And waited,

Now I wait
On Dad,
like she did.

And now I understand
Why she was not ready,
Why she was not their.

And now she waites,
Full of joy
Knowing now I understand
Her world.

Twilight Mourning

"it is a twilight, a ris'n or a setting."

no more they mourn
when gone, i am
who will mourn
in the mor'n
or in eve,
the twilight
is it a rising
or  a setting mourn.

The Dance, Together and Apart

To Dance,  The choice,

Together and apart.

Like two beta fish,

Locked in distance embrass.

Together, and apart.

...

Found, her hair,

in my wallet, Today,

To be carried their, for so long.

Together and apart

like she has carried me,

for so long.

Why do I carry,

It.

Why does she carry,

Me. 

Daily,

We dance.

"The Class"

Dance class, 

once we tried, together.

Together,

we do not dance.

but dance we do, 

Together and apart.

and yet I have her, with me 

Always, The hair,  the dance.

Together, and apart.

Naught, this poem

It is a poem
Is it naught 

To be a naught

Is it then

Then to come
is it naught

In his room, still ther'by

In his room doth he sit
Still their by

Their by he remains,
Still their by.

No time doth he note,
Knoweth he not

That time doth it pass
To come their no more

Still their by.

Words spoken in anger

He was angry
Was he naught.

To be naught
Was he then

To be then,
This angry naught.

She loved him then,
Or did she naught.

To  then, they this
Knew then not.

On poetry, muse and Milton

I asketh It still
The poetry,
from whence doeth it come.
Yet heal'th it does,
And renews again.

My muze,
Maybe Milton,
He is

The ring they share

A number of years ago my Father discovered his stirling silver ring long left in the bottom of a drawer.  I now wear it as a sign of the covenant I share with my parents, wife and children.

"Two the first

The more then still"

Small it was,

This thing they share

T'was not the first.

First not for them

Come'th others
So long ago.

endure'th it now
This thing, they share.

Four children, They come,

and the fifth, t'was lost

Unplanned it was

It's loss, still mourn'd.

"The son"

Now the burden,

Thus he carrie'th

The thing, they shared.

He shares it now
With the ones,

Beloved they are.

T'was not the first

The first they shared.

"Two the first

The more then still"

Plus three now more.

The circle, the ring,

Forever then more..

to rest then mine anger, her sleeping thereby

to their now, she lies.
to sleep then this morn.

To this then I rest
mine anger, this morn

her sleeping thereby.

No more need I mourn,

Our rest then does come,

to this may it rest
her sleeping there'by.

The first two, and the final five.

"The children"
at first, their was three.

So young she was
when they came

Just a child herself

Just young to luv.

"The husband"
Not the first
He was the last.

50 years they shared.

Young luv,
It explores.

"The false first"

He was first,
Then off to war.

"Then the second, and the miscarriage"

The shot gun,
It rested by the fireplace.

Unloaded it was now.

Both parents
Urged the young luv,
to simmer out.

"On her death the discovery"

She saved the letters
Of the first.

50 years latter,
At her death,

In the ceder chest
Still, the puzzle

"The fourth child come to heal, and complete"

A fourth did come
A gift to, renew

To begin anew
Afresh.

With time, and age.
She repaired the mistakes
With the first three,

The final one,

Unplanned, he was

mourned the remainder of her life "

She will meet him now,
This time they share.

On death , or life

They, lived with it

Or, It with them

It was their,

with them.

With them,

Always.

Like an unwelcome dinner guest,

 it comes.

This death

Alone,

leaves it not.

When it does,

A beloved then too.

Together,

They, return not.

It comes again,

With out shame.

Ask it not, 

Then to leave,

Remain it must,

This unwelcome guest.

For to live with death

Is to live the same.

On being driven, to Vulgarity ...

A  poem about a vulgar prophet, people forget that he swore from the pulpit.  Most of his speeches have been edited by his children and followers to remove the vulgarity. I wish we could return the vulgarity for he was a common and vulgar man who taught men to reach for the stars. 

Born common he was...

She died, while he was young

Father left him, for the one 

who replaced her.

Methodist,
at first was he not?

In tongues, yet he spoke
In the language, of their god.

Having been left,

by those he loved.

No one could drive him,

Like a tamed mustang, or mule.

He learned to swear on the open prairie.

Tell him shit, they would not.

Death could do that to one.

Make you more vulgar, a little less common.

Discord in the church,
 cost him,  the life,

of the one, who, could form him, shape him,

prophet, priest, and king.

He would drive them,
 from Nauvoo,
to that place 

Where they would raise, an Ensign to the nations.

Tell him shit, They would not,
these apostles, these men of god.

As he became

A little less common. A little more Vulgar.

Then he raised up their eyes,

and lead them to reach, For their God.

February 2, 2016

after reading a new biography of Brigham Young.
Brigham Young: Pioneer Prophet
by John G. Turner  

Brigham Young

I believe firmly in the value of all vulgar notions, especially of vulgar jokes. When once you have got hold of a vulgar joke, you may be certain that you have got hold of a subtle and spiritual idea. The men who made the joke saw something deep which they could not express except by something silly and emphatic. They saw something delicate which they could only express by something indelicate. ..... In order to understand vulgar humour it is not enough to be humorous. One must also be vulgar, as I am.
(G.K. Chesterton, All Things Considered, P.11)

The book she gave him

The book was blue,

Or was it.

It was the second

she gave him.

The first he lost

While serving his god.

It is worn now,

a little too "real"

One page is missing,

his daughter removed.

When one was small,

together they read.

Twas an accident,

a gift they now share.

In the closet sat it,

other things replaced it.

Now she is gone,

out if the closet it came.

Will it become,

even more real.

And a little less blue,

to unite them still.

The Choice ...

"Was he a good man,

or only just "real"?

he came home

a little too tired

a little too madd?

his momma and daddy 

good where they not...

or only just "real".

He learned to forgive,

He learned to forget

the ones that he luved?

he wasn't quit sure.

how do be good,

or just, to be "real"

like a pot that He see's, 

 He watch'ed there'fore.

To never, to boil.

time, will it tell?

to seek to be good,

or only, just "real" .

steven bassett

01-28-2016 01-29-2016

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Velveteen_Rabbit
by Margery Williams

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Together, and Apart

"Together, and Apart"

she loved him
she loved him not

that is the question

he wondered
as did she.

they came together
and apart

she understood him
and understood him not.

this is a mystery.

together so long
yet still apart.

each day they commit
to come together.

even if,
they are apart.

steven bassett

1-15-2016

On why God weeps

"God’s response to the manifold creatures by whom he is surrounded, the movement of his heart and will in the direction of those other beings, establishes the pattern of his divine activity. As" Joseph "Smith’s Book of Mormon pronounced, “He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world.” And an 1830 text elaborated, “For this is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” ...

 
           ... For Mormons, it is God’s freely made choice to inaugurate and sustain costly loving relationships that is at the very core of his divine identity."

Givens, Terryl L. (2014-10-03). Wrestling the Angel: The Foundations of Mormon Thought: Cosmos, God, Humanity (p. 88). Oxford University Press. Kindle Edition.

To preserve our future...

Hugh B. Brown as a young soldier in the Canadian forces.

Just one word: No matter what your past has been, you have a spotless future.

A week ago tomorrow night I was talking to the young people at Brigham Young University in a fireside. There were 12,500 of them present. A very inspirational time was had. I spoke to them about some of the things that have been spoken of here tonight. I told them they have a spotless future, and asked that they guard that future and remember that when the Judge shall summon them, he will not look them over for medals, for diplomas, for honors, but for scars, and I warned them to beware that there be no stains between the scars.

God help us to be worthy of the responsibility that is ours, both those who are missionaries, and those who have been on missions previously, those of us who are growing old in the work; let us continue faithfully to serve God and keep his commandments. Let us remember what the speakers tonight have said to us, and take their words home with us and put them into practice.

(Hugh B. Brown:The Improvement, December 1969)

On her Death

Anthony Frederick Sandys - Until her Death

Her Death, We speak not of;

Shall it be not her life's shadow;

The shadow she doeth cast'

What light is the source their of?.

that casteth forth;

On her death.

Steven Bassett

09-27-2014

To luv...a choice?!

The choice is to luv,

to this I do see ?

To choose thus I must?

Though painful it be.

This pain then it brings,
To me it does now.

A lesson to learn

A gift to bestow.

Steven Bassett

ON Mommas’ Afghan.

Momma loved to knit afghan’s. They helped her to pass the time when she was watching television. Her Momma taught her how to crochet as a young child. I can remember many hours watching her crochet. She had crocheted so long she no longer watched her stitching, it was a mechanical motion more like walking or chewing gum. I wonder if it helped her to think.

Momma decided each of her children needed a good heavy afghan. She had collected many small balls of yarn from previous project’s The afghan’s were heavy. They had a heavy double stitch, one color on each side. The afghan were so heavy they were best used in the winter.

Each afghan required a year to complete. She worked on those afghans for four years. Each year one of her children received an afghan for Christmas. I wonder if she thought about her children as she was knitting each one of them their afghan. One child could not read well and had difficulty in school. He was color blind and had trouble telling his colors apart. One children read well but had difficulty speaking to people his own age. He never dated much, but was fortunate to find a good woman who understood him. One child never ate enough and had to be reminded when it was time to eat. This child still struggles with her weight and is now developing M.S. One child struggled with her first marriage and lived with Mom for a couple years. Mom helped her to raise her sons until a man came along who loved her boys and adopted them as his own. They now have five more children and how do they keep her busy.

Momma married young and grew up with her children. Her husband was a challenge. Signs of high functioning Autism and hyperactivity are present in the male line of his family. Momma would never have understood these words she just knew Dad had a tough time filtering his thoughts. He spoke out in inappropriate times and in inappropriate places. My Dad and his Father were forbidden to be in the Smith Brother Lumber Company together. One of them at a time was more then a handful.

Each fall my wife pulls the afghan out of the closet and puts is on our bed. I love to fell warm and comforted by it’s weight.

The afghan reminds of my mother and her life. The afghan is no longer perfect like it was when my mother gave it to me. A few years ago I snagged it on a piece of furniture. Their is a small stitch torn out of one side. My mamma's life was like this afghan. It was no loner perfect like it had been when her Momma gave life to her. Even though this afghan is no longer perfect it is still functional and fulfills its purpose. I have ask my wife to repair the snagged. My wife is skilled in the art of crochet. She tells me it is not possible to repair the snag. Even if she did repair the afghan it would no longer be the afghan my mother crocheted. As the year go by I learn to appreciate the afghan for it beauty and its flaw. It becomes more real with time like Margery Williams Velveteen rabbit (see. The Velveteen Rabbit or How Toys Become Real )

Mamma is gone, but the is the afghan remains. My Mom, like her quilt became more real with time. She was deeply flawed. She loved her children and she loved her husband. She always tried her best and luved her family.

With time I have the shed the bitterness and enmity. I am warmed by the afghan and the memories it brings.

If you have the opportunity to live and love, to forgive and to forget, please do. And leave some memories and if possible something that is real like Mommas afghan.

a repost from oct 21 2011.

still true and I still sleep with every night.

From October 21 2011

Originally posted to facebook.com

On life or is it death.

To come to life,

or is it death.

To question now,

this life or love

T'is death to live,

and not to love

To question now,

to this I must

To love I must,

though life be short.

For tis it death,

to love no more.

Steven Bassett

March, 2015

No more, to mourn

"The ones ...

    ... that never were?"

Unknown it was,

from start, to see

Two come so near,

when first they wedd

to now, to see

T'is thorny still

one eye half open,

the other half closed.

To hear and know,

yet know not still.

Create, He not,

Desire, He more.

Revealed not still,

T'was he, not her.

When time did pass,

two more did come.

To share they will,

complete they are.

No more, to mourn

"The ones ...

    ... that never were?"

Steven Bassett

January, 2015

on choosing to rise and not to set.

"The choice, they Share.."

to sit across the table, the silence increasing.

... why they wed, they know not now.
still together they are

their babes brought forth.

to lose the first,  cost what little, they now share.

this new loss, more painful still.

the time

T'is twilight
is it ris'in'
 or (their,there) setting.

The choice thyr'in ...
to choose to rise,
and not to set.

  

the embers 

their remains, enough to choose,
the fire and warmth.
or cold and bitter;  no more to share.

Steven Bassett
01-13-2015

My Testimony

• I deeply believe in the prophet Joseph Smith and in his mission to restore the Church.  
• I believe the church is in a constant state of restoration.
•  I believe God has other prophets too.
• John Milton was his prophet to the English people, as were William Tyndale and John Wycliffe.
• True religion lies somewhere between the faith of Thomas More and the prophetic voice of William Tyndale.

• The church was taken not from the earth at the death of the apostles but was received into the wilderness where she was nourished by his poets and musicians. (see Revelations 12:6)

On an ever expanding Hell...

William Blake "The Marriage of Heaven and Hell"

“Woe to those who join house to house,

who add field to field,

until there is no more room,

and you are made to dwell alone in the midst of the land. “

(Isaiah 5:8)

“The Great Divorce”, is a fable, told by C.S. Lewis. In the story a choice is made, to stay in Perdition and make it a Hell or take a bus ride and start a journey to Heaven.

The fable takes place in two locations. 

The first is a great city that, with the passage of time, transforms from purgatory to hell. It is in a great twilight, uncertain if is ev'n or morn'.

The second is a great meadow, leading to Heaven.  At this meadow friends and family greet the new comers and urge them to take the path to heaven.

One of the interesting facets of Hell/Purgatory is the ever expanding city, dark gray and dingy.  

Hell/Purgatory is every where expanding because men have not love for each other but are driven to expand outward continually.  

Thus hell never ceases to increase. 

This ever expanding hell is but a small sliver, a crack between two blades of grass in the great meadow.

Read then of faith; That shone above the fagot,

 

 

Read, Sweet, How Others Strove

Read, sweet, how others strove,

Till we are stouter;

What they renounced,

Till we are less afraid;

How many times they bore the faithful witness,

Till we are helped As if a kingdom cared.

Read then of faith

That shone above the fagot,

Clear strains of hymn

The river could not drown,

Brave names of men

And celestial women

Passed out of record

Into renown.

Emily Dickinson, “Read, Sweet, How Others Strove,” in Complete Poems (Boston: Little, Brown, 1960), 119–20.

Did this destruction by fire destroy the the body of Christ or anneal his true church?
Individuals paid a heavy price to strengthen the church and greater Kingdom of God

 fag·ot

noun: faggot; plural noun: faggots; noun: fagot; plural noun: fagots

    a bundle of sticks or twigs bound together as fuel.

        a bundle of iron rods bound together for reheating, welding, and hammering into bars.

an·neal

verb past tense: annealed; past participle: annealed

    heat (metal or glass) and allow it to cool slowly, in order to remove internal stresses and toughen it.
        Biochemistry
        recombine (DNA) in the double-stranded form following separation by heat.

O' hear the cry of the uncleav'd womb

Leonardo Da Vinci's lab notes

what of the cry, of the empty womb

create'th it not  but, a ball sized wound.

it cries now for Sara's, two thousand sons.

lost at the birth, of the savior/son

and what of the portions, joined not at birth.

long barren they were, so she cleav'd its' parts.

and what of the Gift, of the sisters luv.

she give'th them now, to share'th their womb.

and what of the child's, and husband so dear,

endureth they must,  the wound now returned

and what of the time, remaineth their still.

grateful they are, for that which remains.

and what of the ones, receiveth they still,

the gift have they now, of the savior/ son.

Steven Bassett

2015

on the dictatorship and absolutism of scientific thought

Science can tell us a great deal about the world. It can tell us what the stars are made of, explain how a lightning bug flashes in the night sky, and describe the process of cell division that leads a zygote to become a baby girl. But it does not tell us why we should care about the nature of stars, why the staccato flash of insects in the night delights us, or how the child should live. The error of believing that science represents the highest, or purest, or only reliable guide to truth is the error of scientism. Philosophers like Maurice Merleau-Ponty have pointed out that the problem is not science itself, one of the greatest and most fruitful of all human enterprises. The healthy stance is not “to question the validity of physical laws or the veracity of mathematical equations, but rather . . . to break the dictatorship and absolutism of scientific thought over all other forms of human thinking.”12

Givens, Terryl; Givens, Fiona (2014-09-05). The Crucible of Doubt (Kindle Locations 322-328). Deseret Book Company. Kindle Edition.

On Mothers' Eve.

God the Son informing Eve of the consequences of her choice to eat the forbidden fruit and learn good from evil.

In gaining the knowledge of procreation, she will learn by experience how to be a god and govern her children, this act will increase her sorrow.

"Thy sorrow I will greatly multiplie [193]

By thy Conception;

Children thou shalt bring In sorrow forth," 

(John Milton, Paradise Lost Book 10)

"Four times my mother bore children.

Four times she offered her life,

on the delivery table,

In sorrow she brought forth,

four children.

A fifth she lost in utero,

she named him Dana Allen.

She mourned his loss,

the remainder of her days."

(Steven Lynn Bassett , The Offering of her Life)

A new take on Pascal's Wager

George MacDonald with son Ronald (right) and daughter Mary (left) in 1864. Photograph by Lewis Carroll.

"Whatever energies I may or may not have,

I know one thing for certain,

that I could not devote them to anything else

I should think entirely worth doing.

Indeed nothing else seems interesting enough

--nothing to repay the labour,

but the telling of my fellow-men

about the one man who is the truth,

and to know whom is the life.

Even if there be no hereafter,

I would live my time believing

in a grand thing

that ought to be true

if it is not.

No facts can take the place of truths,

and if these be not truths,

then is the loftiest part of our nature

a waste.

Let me hold by the better than the actual,

and fall into nothingness

off the same precipice with Jesus

and John

and Paul

and a thousand more,

who were lovely in their lives,

and with their death

make even the nothingness

into which they have passed

like the garden of the Lord.

I will go further, Polwarth, and say,

 I would rather die  for evermore

believing as Jesus believed,

than live for evermore

believing as those that deny him.

If there be no God,

I feel assured that existence is

and could be

but a chaos of contradictions,

whence can emerge nothing worthy

to be called a truth,

nothing worth living for.—

No, I will not give up my curacy. I will teach that which IS good, even if there should be no God to make a fact of it, and I will spend my life on it, in the growing hope, which MAY become assurance, that there is indeed a perfect God, worthy of being the Father of Jesus Christ, and that it was BECAUSE they are true, that these things were lovely to me and to so many men and women, of whom some have died for them, and some would be yet ready to die."

(George Macdonald, Thomas Wingfold, Curate, chapter 75)

On Male equality and Female ordination.

"Yet there is another point to the feminist argument, and a valid one at that -- why aren't men looking up to the women? Or at the very least, what aren't women feeling that men are taking them seriously? Women are in leadership positions, they speak in General Conference. Are men taking these women with a grain of salt? This is a personal question each man should answer and has nothing to do with the priesthood. It has to do with the lack of understanding some men (and women) have with the organization of the Church. If all leadership are called of God, then all leadership are equally worth our ears when they speak, regardless of gender.

It should be remembered that the priesthood keys given to women to run the Church, keys to teach, preach, lead, preside, etc, are given now without being ordained to the Priesthood. A man cannot do this. A man cannot hold a calling or even enter the temple without holding the Priesthood. Maybe we should be asking ourselves why men need the Priesthood to become equal to women."

http://www.opednews.com/articles/2/Women-and-the-Priesthood-i-by-E-David-Ferriman-Equal_Religion_Religion_Women-Equal-Rights-140617-270.html

on becoming, how our sorrows drive us to the house of prayer

"Gladness may make a man forget his thanksgiving; misery drives him to his prayers. For we are not yet, we are only becoming. ...there are two door-keepers to the house of prayer, and Sorrow is more on the alert to open than her grandson Joy" 

 "If a wife so love that she would keep every opposition, every inconsistency in her husband's as yet but partially harmonious character, she does not love well enough for the kingdom of heaven. If its imperfections be essential to the individuality she loves, and to the repossession of her joy in it, she may be sure that, if he were restored to her as she would have him, she would soon come to love him less--perhaps to love him not at all;" ...


 ... "Neither is it any man's peculiarities that make him beloved; it is the essential humanity underlying those peculiarities."

(Hope of the Gospel; George Macdonald, ch 10)

On Living with Autism, and keeping a Covenant.

This is the covenant my wife and mother have kept.

Living with one with autism can be a burden even when my mother had no name for it and did not understand it.

TAMMY WYNETTE LYRICS
"Stand By Your Man"

Sometimes it's hard to be a woman
Giving all your love to just one man
You'll have bad times, and he'll have good times
Doin' things that you don't understand
But if you love him, you'll forgive him
Even though he's hard to understand
And if you love him, oh be proud of him
'Cause after all he's just a man.
Stand by your man, give him two arms to cling to
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can.
Stand by your man.
Stand by your man, and show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can.
Stand by your man.

SONGWRITERS
BILLY SHERRILL;TAMMY WYNETTE

PUBLISHED BY
EMI AL GALLICO MUSIC CORP.

On the inheritance, Male and Female

Once a man received as his inheritance two keys. The first key, he was told, would open a vault which he must protect at all cost. The second key was to a safe within the vault which contained a priceless treasure. He was to open this safe and freely use the precious things which were stored therein. He was warned that many would seek to rob him of his inheritance. He was promised that if he used the treasure worthily, it would be replenished and never be diminished, not in all eternity. He would be tested. If he used it to benefit others, his own blessings and joy would increase.

The man went alone to the vault. His first key opened the door. He tried to unlock the treasure with the other key, but he could not, for there were two locks on the safe. His key alone would not open it. No matter how he tried, he could not open it. He was puzzled. He had been given the keys. He knew the treasure was rightfully his. He had obeyed instructions, but he could not open the safe.

In due time, there came a woman into the vault. She, too, held a key. It was noticeably different from the key he held. Her key fit the other lock. It humbled him to learn that he could not obtain his rightful inheritance without her.

They made a covenant that together they would open the treasure and, as instructed, he would watch over the vault and protect it; she would watch over the treasure. She was not concerned that, as guardian of the vault, he held two keys, for his full purpose was to see that she was safe as she watched over that which was most precious to them both. Together they opened the safe and partook of their inheritance. They rejoiced for, as promised, it replenished itself.

BOYD K. PACKER General Conference October 1993

On cheap grace.

"Cheap grace is preaching forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession. … Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate."

"costly grace confronts us as a gracious call to follow Jesus, it comes as a word of forgiveness to the broken spirit and the contrite heart. It is costly because it compels a man to submit to the yoke of Christ and follow him; it is grace because Jesus says: "My yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

On Gloria's touch.

How I met Gloria

I first met Gloria in the fall of  1985, in Vicksburg Mississippi.  I was in the Louisiana-Mississippi area teaching people about the restored Church of Christ and helping them to become members of the Church of Jesus Christ Latter-Day Saints.
 

When I was fourteen years old I was ask by one of my church leaders to commit to serving a mission.  I loved and respected this man.  I accepted this challenge and used the next  5 years to prepare serve a mission.

My Mom and I entered an a covenant that if I prepared myself to serve she would find a way to support me.  This was a big commitment on her part.  We where not a wealthy family.  My Mom believed in the teaching's of the church. She had not attended services for a number of years, at least 10.  

It is a central doctrine of our church that to enter Heaven we need to be baptized by someone having the Priesthood or authority to baptize.  This authority was given to the founder of our church by an angel, John the Baptist, the same person that baptized Jesus Christ.  This same authority has been passed down from man to man by the laying on of hands.  I was ordained by my Bishop, Glen Owen Waite when I turned 16 years old. 

Our church has a lay Priesthood and all worthy men in our church receive the same authority.  I was ordained by my bishop because my Father, who holds the same authority, had stopped attending church.  My Father had ordained me to the two previous steps in the priesthood, Deacon and Teacher.  If my father had been attending church he would have ordained me to next 2 steps in the priesthood, Priest and Elder.   I was ordained to my final step in the priesthood, Elder, by my beloved uncle, Deloye Grand Herzog, when I turned 18.

My missionary companion and I met Gloria in a Hospital.  She was receiving treatment for brain cancer. It was this cancer that would end Gloria's life.  Gloria had learned about our church while being treated for cancer in a hospital in Jackson Mississippi.  This member of my church had not attended services in a number of years and no longer practiced the faith.

 Gloria life and death started me an exploration.

We have a Priesthood Ordinance.  It is a blessing with Olive Oil and sealing with the Priesthood.  I participated in offering this ordinance to Gloria.  I did want to be seen as a faith healer.

• I wanted to see Gloria enter the covenant of Baptism
• I did not want her to join to save her life.  

She was Baptized after I transferred to my next area.  Gloria died of cancer about a year later.

• Gloria helped me to understand that God works in many wonderful ways.  He uses all children to bless each other.  We are his hands on Earth. 

• God used my parents, who did not attend church to support me on a mission

• God used a member of our church who did attend services to help Gloria gain a testimony of Christ.

We may not see the many hidden hands and ways God uses to bless his children.

"... it is quite possible that God’s purpose is something different from the purpose of either party; and yet the human instrumentalities, working just as they do, are of the best adaptation to effect his purpose."

 (Collected Works of Abraham Lincoln, edited by Roy P. Basler.)